Setting the Scene: After midnight in New Jersey. Benjy and Paul are in the middle of a conversation, each smoking a cigarette.
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Benjy: In New Jersey they just passed this fucking bully law – you hear about this shit?
Paul: Uh-huh.
Benjy: I read this in the paper the other day.
Paul: Yep.
Benjy: What the fuck do these people thing they’re fucking doing? I mean Jesus-fuckme-Christ! Getting pushed around a little builds character. And bullies don’t go away either. They’re around when you’re out of school. I can’t fucking stand it. I mean, why do we have to hold our kids’ fucking hands all the time. Let them figure shit out on their own. Toughen them up a bit. When I go to work I pass these fucks…you know what I’m talking about. These fucks with their fucking stop signs. They have no qualms about stepping into traffic, clogging up intersections, making people slam on their fucking breaks – all because these kids can’t fucking wait for the light to change. What’s this shit? We already have LIGHTS telling these fucking kids when they can cross. Unbe-fucking-lievable.
Paul: Did you say “Jesus-fuck-me-Christ”?
Benjy: What?
Paul: You said “Jesus-fuck-me-Christ.”
Benjy: No I said “Jesus-fucking-Christ”.
Paul: You didn’t. You said you want Jesus to fuck you.
Benjy: Well…don’t you?
Paul: I’m not a fag!
Benjy: It’s not about being a fag. It’s about Jesus. If Jesus wants to fuck me then I’m going to take one for the team and let him fuck me.
Paul: And that makes you a fag.
Benjy: No it doesn’t. It makes me a humanitarian.
Paul: A humanitarian?
Benjy: Of course. Jesus wants to fuck me so I let him fuck me. You can’t turn away Jesus…that’s why he’s Jesus.
Paul: Well, you’d better be prepared. Because you know Jesus has a big fucking cock.
Benjy: Yeah, ‘cause he’s black.
Paul: Big ol’ black Jesus cock…in your ass because of humanity.
Benjy: Yeah…anyway…
Paul: You were ranting about bullies.
Benjy: Yeah…
Paul: You OK, Ben?
Benjy: Can I use your bathroom
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